Living Wishes Over Loud Goals | A Gentle Mid-January Reflection
- Eva
- Jan 21
- 5 min read
A Gentle Mid-January Reflection
Dear you,
Before I sat down to write this, I did what I seem to do every early morning lately.
While the world was still wrapped in its cosy dark blanket, I carried a freshly made coffee upstairs to my roof terrace. I sat outside, gently swinging in my chair, smiling as I greeted the new day. The air was soft, wrapped in a quiet morning fog, and for a moment everything felt suspended - unrushed, unfinished, safe.
What struck me most was the birds. They sounded like spring.
How strange, I thought - January still holding winter in its arms, yet already whispering of what’s to come. And of course, we know spring will arrive. It always does. But for now… maybe we can let January be January. Gently. Kindly. Including towards ourselves.
This gentle mid-January reflection came from choosing wishes over goals, and calm over constant productivity.
A Gentle Start to the Year
This year, I started slowly.
So far, I’ve only shared one blog - Unfinished, on Purpose. And honestly, I loved how it landed. Some of you even told me you tried “chair therapy” (which made me smile deeply). It reminded me that usefulness doesn’t come from volume - it comes from presence.
Behind the scenes, I’ve been working on something else too. Not goals. Not resolutions.
Instead, I wrote my 100 living wishes for 2026.
I wanted to begin this year with the same calm energy I finished the last one with.
And rather than setting big, rigid goals, I chose something softer - wishes that feel kind, spacious, and realistic for where I am now.
Around Christmas, I became more aware of the rush and noise that seemed to exist everywhere - the shops, the to-do lists, the sense of urgency in the air. Observing it from the outside only deepened my desire for the opposite. These first weeks of January feel quieter and more reflective for me. And yet, online, there still seems to be an intense push to optimise, plan, and achieve - often without pausing to reflect on what the past year actually held.
Why Loud Goal-Setting Can Lead to Burnout
We live in a productivity-obsessed culture that quietly suggests we should always be pushing forward. But I’m starting to feel more and more that this isn’t the best strategy (and yes - that’s me gently questioning it).
There’s a growing conversation in therapy spaces about values-based living - choosing what truly matters, rather than constantly chasing productivity.
Because over time, that constant push can lead to burnout. And it often leaves very little space for goals that don’t “look productive” - like spending time with family, tending to your inner world, practising your spirituality, or supporting your community.
Interestingly, science gently agrees. Research on burnout and nervous system regulation shows that sustained pressure without reflection or recovery increases emotional exhaustion and disconnection. Motivation doesn’t grow under force - it grows in safety. When we feel regulated, supported, and allowed to move at a human pace, our energy returns naturally.
A Softer Way to Think About Goals
So if you do have goals this year, maybe a gentler approach could help. Here’s a simple five-step reflection you might like to try:
Pause before planning. Reflect on what last year taught you - not just what you achieved.
Name what matters beyond work. Relationships, health, meaning, rest all count.
Choose rhythms over deadlines. Think in seasons, not sprints.
Leave space for change. You’re allowed to evolve - your plans can too.
Check in with your body. If a goal feels tight or heavy, it may need softening.
Living Wishes Instead of Resolutions
As for me, I’m choosing wishes over resolutions this year.
They’re not targets to hit or things to optimise - just gentle intentions for how I want to live, feel, and move through the year ahead.
I’ve been holding my list quietly, letting it guide me in small, everyday ways. And if the idea speaks to you, you might like to try something similar - writing a few living wishes in a journal, or placing them somewhere visible, not as reminders of what to achieve, but as permissions for how to be.
At the end of this post, you’ll find a small downloadable image with a few of my own living wishes - shared gently, in case you’d like to keep or reflect with them too.
Before you go...
Thank you for being here and for taking these few quiet minutes to read. It really means more than I can put into words.
If something in this reflection stayed with you, you’re warmly welcome to share it with someone who might need a gentle pause too - or simply sit with it for yourself, just as it is.
May the good intentions land softly.
May the wishes feel safe to grow.
And may this year meet us where we are - not where we think we should be.
With love,
Eva
More calm, if you need it
If you missed it, my earlier reflection Unfinished, on Purpose https://www.molemindfullife.com/post/unfinished-on-purpose-gentle-january-reflections-on-letting-gocontinues this gentle January theme - a quiet reminder that being unfinished can still be enough.
That reflection later flowed into a 10-minute guided meditation, Letting Go Gently
( https://youtu.be/bXpQB5AdCE4?si=ocPAViHA_p9ta7p6 ), created as a calm companion for moments when listening feels more supportive than thinking.
I recorded it in my happy place in the Lake District - surrounded by space, stillness, and ease.
You’re very welcome to explore either, only if and when it feels right.
The reflections, meditations, and content shared here are offered for general information, inspiration, and personal reflection only.
They are not intended to replace professional medical, psychological, or therapeutic advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Nothing on this website creates, or is intended to create, a medical or therapeutic relationship. If you have questions about your health, mental wellbeing, or any medical condition, please seek guidance from a qualified healthcare professional you trust. Always consult a licensed professional before starting, changing, or stopping any form of treatment, medication, or wellness practice.
Please listen to your body, move at your own pace, and take what feels supportive - leaving the rest behind.
Gentle references & further reading
• World Health Organization. (2019). Burn-out as an occupational phenomenon (ICD-11).
(Still the current international classification used in research and clinical settings.)
• Maslach, C., Leiter, M. P., & Schaufeli, W. B. (2022). Measuring burnout: Current perspectives and future directions. Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Organizational Behavior.
• Joyce, S., Modini, M., Christensen, H., et al. (2023). Workplace interventions for mental health and burnout: A systematic review. The Lancet Psychiatry.
• Porges, S. W., Dana, D. A. (2023). Clinical applications of the polyvagal theory. Frontiers in Psychology.
• Gloster, A. T., et al. (2024). Values-based living and psychological flexibility as predictors of wellbeing. Journal of Contextual Behavioral Science.
• Neff, K. D., & Germer, C. K. (2023). Self-compassion and mental health: Recent advances. Current Opinion in Psychology.