Why Togetherness Heals Us: A Mindful December Reflection

"Warmth isn't something we find - it's something we make in each other."

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Mindful December Reflection

Dear you,

December always arrives with a softness I can’t quite explain. It’s not the rush for presents (you won’t find me sprinting through shops - my chronic time doesn’t run marathons :) ).

It’s the moments. The ones that sneak up quietly and remind me: warmth is something we make, not buy.

This year, my mum visited at the start of December. We cooked simple food together, went for slow walks around the park, and watched films side by side - at one point she held my hand and suddenly the whole day felt like a gift wrapped in tenderness.

A calm beginning to the month. A little reminder that love doesn’t need spectacle… just presence.

And then there’s the yearly gingerbread dough I mix by hand - a tradition in my home.

It rests for days, filling the kitchen with that sweet, spicy promise.

My daughter decorates the biscuits in ways that would definitely not make Pinterest proud, but they make us proud.

And that’s the kind of magic December is made of.

Why Togetherness Matters

Neuroscience tells us that when we connect - even in small, humble ways - our bodies release oxytocin, the “cuddle hormone.” It quiets stress, steadies the heart, and reminds the nervous system: you’re safe here.

We don’t need big gatherings for that. It can happen while sharing soup, walking beside someone we love, or laughing in a messy kitchen.

Togetherness is a mindful practice. A way of saying: I see you. I’m here. And this moment is enough.

Cozy Ways to Gather (Tried & True in My Home)

The Sunday Soup Pot

Everyone brings bread. No pressure, no perfection - just warmth.

Board Games & Giggles

Winning is optional. Laughing is not.

The Gingerbread Evening

Dough resting for days, biscuits decorating, memories forming.

The Tea Chat Ritual

Phones away. Stories shared. Hearts soften in warm mugs.

A Slow Wander Through a Christmas Market

No rush. Just glowing stalls, something warm to hold, and someone to walk beside.

A Gentle Space for Those Alone This Season

If you’re reading this and December feels quiet for you - please know this:

Togetherness also includes you. You are not outside the circle. Your presence matters, even in silence, even in solitude.

Sometimes connection is as simple as:

• a warm drink in your hands

• saying hello to a neighbour

• joining a small event

• sharing a moment with someone online who makes you feel seen.

Your December doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Warmth can be created in many ways.

A Soft Word for Those Carrying Loss

For some, Christmas isn’t sparkling - it’s tender. A reminder of the people who are no longer here.

I carry my own little pockets of grief too. But when I look at old photos, I imagine their presence beside me - smiling, nudging, laughing, still part of my story. Love doesn’t end.

It changes shape, becomes quieter, but never disappears.

If this season feels heavy for you, I hope you feel your loved one in small ways…in a song,

a scent, a recipe, a memory that warms instead of stings.

You’re not alone in that tenderness.

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The best part of memories

is making them.

Not the perfect photos

or polished plans -

just crumbs on the table,

gingerbread cooling,

hands reaching across a sofa,

and the soft realisation

that this - right here -

is its own kind of miracle.

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My Gentle Invitation :)

With two weeks until Christmas, maybe choose one simple moment of togetherness:

soup, tea, a walk, a phone call - nothing grand. Let presence be your gift, not perfection.

And if your days feel busy or chaotic, remember: you don’t have to keep up with December.

You’re allowed to slow it down.

Before you go…

Looking back, it’s never the gifts I remember. It’s the gingerbread dough under my hands.

My kids laughter. My mum holding my hand. It’s the way ordinary moments become sacred when shared.

So here’s to warmth over rush, presence over pressure, and the kind of togetherness that doesn’t require a performance - just a heart.

And if you feel like it, share with me - what’s your favourite way to gather, or to feel connected, this season? I’d love to hear.

With love,

Eva

"You don't need a perfect life to feel connected - just one honest moment shared with someone who sees you."

References

• Carter, C.S. (2023) Oxytocin & social connection.

• Heinrichs & Domes (2022) Social support & stress.

• Hobson et al. (2023) Rituals & wellbeing.

• Harvard Health (2023) Why relationships matter.

• Holt-Lunstad (2023) Loneliness & connection.

• Klass & Steffen (2023) Grief & continuing bonds.

• Porges (2022) Polyvagal theory & co-regulation.